Saturday, September 12, 2009

Question 46

Question: Do I look fat in these jeans?
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Answer: Yes. But not because you are fat. It is because you are a motherfucking rock band. Rockers have what doctors call "penile anaconditis." To simplify, it means they must wrap their manhood around their waists several times to avoid it getting tangled in the mic cords. This cock bulge gives the appearance of looking fat, despite not being obese. Only exceptions are Eddie Van Halen, who has a woman in the pants with him swallowing the excess, and Pete Wentz. He tucks his in his ass.

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